3 Grammar Rules You Need to Forget

High School was more than likely a turbulent time for you. There was so much going on and so many expectations to live up to. 

So many changes...so much confusion...so much acne...

You had to be cool, wear the right clothes, be good at sports, join the cheer squad, or toot a horn in the band. I was and did none of these things.

Oh, and there was that thing where you went to a room with a bunch of desks and zoned out for an hour while some old lady droned on and on about the correct use of commas.

I won't lie, I did not pay much attention in high school English classes. You may be able to tell...

I was not a good student, and it did not interest me, so I did not sink the time into grammar. 

If I could see the I probably should have.

I am not an expert, but I have learned enough from real world writing to know that the following 3 rules are ones that you need to flush down the shitter while you are getting a swirly...

Using Two Spaces After a Period. space space

This one was and is stupid. I never followed that rule throughout my school career and yes, my grades suffered. 

Why did anyone use this rule?

Typewriters. They learned to type on typewriters with monospaced characters (the 2 spaces indicate a full stop). 

This is ironic because I writer my drafts on a typewriter and I still DO NOT use the two spaces after the period.

Lucky for us, this rule is finally going away as the old geezers still teaching it are re-learning to wear diapers.

Avoiding Contractions

Wouldn't you shorten words if you could?

Yes. Yes, you would.

It sounds more natural, especially in dialogue. We do not say do no unless we are speaking in extremely proper English. Otherwise, we say don't.

I find this relevant for expressing your character's roots. A stodgy member of the English aristocracy might skip the contractions with enunciation, but an Appalachian American might skip the enunciation for the contractions.

Don't use contractions in a scholarly journal article or an essay for school, but anywhere else they are good to go. 

Within reason.

AND ain't still ain't a word because my teach said it ain't.

Starting a Sentence with a Conjunction

But that was how I was taught in school! Wah, Wah, Wah. Shut the hell up.

Wow. Harsh.  Misplaced aggression? Yes...

The teachers said you couldn't, but lo and behold I just did it! No cosmic lighting struck me down from on grammatical high!

Like contractions, you would not want to start your sentences with a conjunction in a scholarly or academic paper.

As you can see, it is fine in a blog post or a novel. 

Don't sweat it because there is no real basis for this rule. Like anything else, don't overuse!

Trust Your Instinct

There is a good chance you felt that these rules were bullshit in school when you read a published author who broke each and every rule in a single paragraph. 

Trust your instinct.

Because you were right!

Follow the other rules though...most of them are necessary.